31 October 2008

Happy Halloween!

I hope you're all having a safe & fun Halloween. Please send me pictures if you or anyone you know dressed up. It's not a real holiday here, though they did have some pictures of witches around the candy at the grocery store this week. Weird since no one trick or treats. I miss Halloween.

It's Saturday at 2pm here and I am still in my pj's, unwashed & useless. Saturdays are by far the worst day for me. I think the fact that I don't get to rest at all during the week and I don't have time to feel bad, it all catches up with me today. I have at least brushed my teeth, washed my face & added some extra deodorant to my stinkiness! I just feel like it's a sick day or something and I don't want to leave the couch ... so I probably won't unless I get bold and paint my toenails. Don't feel sorry for me, I'm quite happy.

So I took a very important test for the baby. I consulted the ancient Chinese gender predictor ... online. It tells me I'm having a girl so there you go - prepare the pink. Apparently it's because I was 28 when I conceived and I conceived in September. Hmmmm. We'll see.

Here are my latest baby acquisitions. The adorable monster toy is our first official baby toy gift from Uncle Yusuf! Very cuddly and so soft, I may keep it for myself. The dignified teddy bear is just for decoration unless our little one likes cuddling sandpaper. But check that onesie on found on etsy.com! It's a little Nashville, Tennessee with the crossed guitar & banjo! God bless creative people who can read my mind and make sure things like this exist.

Anyhoo, that's all from me. I need to find something this body doesn't mind eating. Love you!

25 October 2008

more crap

I got so tickled about Joseph Fiennes that I forgot to add the rest of the due date info:

Gemini is the third sign of the zodiac. It runs from 22 May to 21 June. It is an Air sign, represented by the Twins

Birthstone (Modern):

Birthstone (Mystical):

Birthstone (Ayurvedic):

Birth Flower:
Lily of the Valley

World Holidays:
Sun Screen Day - summer's coming so stock up on sun cream!

Hmmmm ... May is the start of fall in Australia so that holiday's not really relevant to our little Gemini Joseph Fiennes Lily of the Valley baby. Oh well.


Well, we had our first ultrasound this morning. Very exciting - I got a bit misty-eyed because we could actually see the baby looked like a baby instead of the squirrel I expected. Still didn't cry, which makes me think I'm turning into a robot. Anyway, it was kicking its little legs around and it was awesome.

It turns out that I'm only 9 weeks pregnant instead of 10 like I thought, which was a tiny disappointment because I really don't want one more week of pregnancy added but I have recovered. My new due date is 27th May. I updated it on babycenter.com.au and they gave me the major points for that date:

1919: The pop-up toaster was patented
1922: Christopher Lee, actor and Saruman the White in The Lord Of The Rings trilogy, was born
1933: The Walt Disney Company released The Three Little Pigs, with its song 'Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?'
1970: Joseph Fiennes, and star of Shakespeare In Love, was born
1975: Jamie Oliver, TV chef, was born

Now, if you know much about me you will know that the next to last one there is HUGE for me because Joseph Fiennes has been on my top 5 list since Shakespeare in Love came out yonks ago. I shouldn't tell you this but every password I have ever had has revolved around Joseph Fiennes and I considered writing a strongly worded letter to the Academy when he wasn't nominated for an Oscar. I just woke Marcel up from a deep sleeping nap to scream "OUR BABY IS DUE ON JOSEPH FIENNES BIRTHDAY!!" and he totally understood how significant it is. I am stoked. I also love Saruman, toasters, The Three Little Pigs & Jamie Oliver so really all disappointment in adding another week to pregnancy is fading away.

After all the poking around on my abdomen today I felt quite queasy so today turned into a lazy one. I always have to have one weekend day that I waste reading and sleeping since I have no time to spare during the week for naps or just quiet restful moments at work. I'm incredibly thankful that I have energy all day at work by the way - it has been intense recently so I'm lucky.

Anyway that's all the poop that's fit to scoop.

23 October 2008


I ate a whole pizza last night (minus one slice). I think my appetite is coming back.
I'm making chewy chocolate chip cookies tonight so Cletus the fetus shall be dining in luxury.

19 October 2008

manic monday

The boat went well, even managed to enjoy some picnic foods. It's always really nice to be with the Ellis family. First of all because they're just fantastic but also now that they have the beautiful little Tara (who is just 3 weeks!), it's so good to be around a baby and know that all the crap going on in my womb is going to be worth it eventually. The fact that I had to cover my nose with a scarf on the train this morning because the guy next to me reeked of alcohol that kept making me gag is just plain annoying. I don't want to be that rude! But it will all be worth it if we have a sweet little thing like Tara. If we end up with some Turd Ferguson, I won't be a happy chappy.

Turd Ferguson is now a prune by the way because I am up to a grand 10 weeks. We have our first ultrasound this weekend, which is exciting. It's just to officially date the pregnancy so I do have a terrible fear that I'm going to find out that I'm actually only 8 weeks or something like that. I don't want to add any more time to this journey, I'm afraid.

I almost ripped Marcel's arm off for his McDonald's crispy chicken sandwich last night after I loudly proclaimed how there was no way I could get one because it would make me deathly ill. Once he took one bite, I realised I had to have that sandwich - poor boy got less than half of his own meal due to my maniacal food issues. I will be having a whole crispy chicken sandwich tonight because my stolen goods were not enough to hit the spot last night. So sad. He's going to have to start taking his meals separately because I either steal them or they make me nauseous and he doesn't appreciate the grossed-out faces I can't keep to myself. I'm a terrible wife.

Besides the gagging, I'm feeling okay for now. We had weird sleep patterns over the weekend so I have to get that back in order so I don't keep waking up throughout the night. I would like to lie down on the couch 3 feet from my desk and sleep for a good hour but I'm going to resist and do some more work so I can sleep soundly tonight. Huzzah for being a grown-up.

16 October 2008

out to sea

The nausea has subsided a lot, which I'm very thankful for but I'm still eating very little. Everything sounds/smells/looks terrible and I gag constantly. That's really classy by the way. Walking behind someone smoking or with strong smelling food and I can't hold in my gagging so then I have to make it seem like a yawn or a cough. I just look crazy.

Thanks to the insane food aversion I have lost 3 kilos (6.6 pounds). I'd rather have food. I miss food! But I have gotten a crazy amount of energy this week - almost downright hyper. I've even managed to stay up late a couple of nights, which is rare for me, and I find myself waking up during the night. Again, normally I'm borderline narcoleptic. I'm hoping to crash this weekend and catch up on sleep so maybe I won't be as wired next week, though I have to admit it's keeping me up to scratch at work! Also having a facial this weekend because the pregancy "glow" nonsense is just a bunch of oil.

On the plus side, my lady lumps are filling in quite nicely. Little tops that were once cute summer shirts are now a bit more obscene and I'm suddenly startled to be the girl that guys no longer look in the face. Fantastic. Between my lost weight and these new additions, I may just be ready for bikini season - if only I would add some exercise and a tan to my routine.

And I'd like to take a moment to thank some anonymous source who suggested my dear husband could still get a boat with a baby on the way. He has taken your advice and we plan to christen the new vessel this weekend. We will not be naming it EZ Livin' III. I'm sure there will be many tragedies to come with this boat and the fact that I feel seasick on land already. Oh well.

12 October 2008

Olives are good.

I'm 9 weeks now and feeling ill and not in a Beastie Boys kinda way. The baby is officially a fetus. Not sure what it was before but there you go. And it's the size of a green olive so it's moving up in the world of finger foods. I spent most of this afternoon in bed, willing the nausea and sleepiness away but it didn't work so now I'm going to get a frozen Coke (I am allowed some caffeine and a couple of these a week is not going to do damage), which always soothes my woes. Another solution that a lot of the crazy pregnant women on the forums out there in cyber land suggest is SOUR CANDIES! How fantastic is that? I think it's giving me permission to eat as many sour patch kids as possible to make me feel good. I'm taking the challenge and they do help a bit so something is right in this universe.

Later skater.

07 October 2008

major error

Oh ... my ... word, I made the biggest error in that blog. Apparently it's Young MC that brings us the joy of Bust a Move instead of Tone Loc. Oops. So now I have to name my son Young MC instead of Tone Loc.

She's dressed in yellow, she says hello, come sit next to me you fine fellow.

The food situation is getting dire, I'm afraid. The nausea has lifted a little bit thanks to some morning sickness vitamins I bought (I would have bought heroin if they told me it cured the nausea, let's be honest) but the thought of food still makes me heave, which is a delightful quality in a lady. I can handle exactly one food item at a time if I do decide I can eat. I got the thought of cottage cheese in my head this afternoon so the whole hour & 1/2 trip home on the train, I was thinking of cottage cheese and how that would be my evening meal. I was very excited to actually want something, but by the time I got off the train, I had made myself sick of cottage cheese. I'm having popcorn for supper instead. I do what I have to. I actually went out and bought frozen tater tots yesterday after I had a dream about them, which is incredibly pathetic. Again, I got so worked up over the fact that they actually sounded appetizing that by the time I got them home, they sounded gross again. I did manage Thai food for lunch today, which I thought would never be possible so that was a major victory in this battle between me and the busy little placenta-building, food-snubbing, raspberry-sized monster in my womb.

There were only two things I was positive about with pregnancy and only two - that my hunger would be unstoppable and that I would cry every 30 seconds. Instead, I have lost a few pounds (but not in my boobs - huzzah!) and I have not cried a single time. That's right, the girl who has wept during every major sitcom and can not even hear the music from Forrest Gump without sobbing ... I have not shed a tear. I am out of the daze so it's not that and I'm very happy, which usually causes me to cry more than sadness. The only times I have gotten teary-eyed is when a good song comes on but still no tears have fallen.

The music thing is just weird. I mentioned at the very beginning how I reverted back to my old music when the hormones kicked in. I still find myself very emotional over music. And it's not what you think - it's not the sappy ballads that are getting me, it's the good stuff. We have some very weird radio stations in our area - one of which was playing Tone Loc's Bust a Move tonight when I happened to stumble across it. Very few songs on earth make me as happy as this one - I become an unstoppable hip hop machine when this song comes on. So it came on the radio and I start smiling and rapping, then thinking to myself "Wow, I love this song. It really makes me happy. It's just such a good song ..." then I notice I have tears in my eyes. My unborn child can't inspire me to cry but Tone Loc can? WHY?? Then I turned the station to the world's single greatest radio station - 5-0 Plus. It's a community station for people who are over 50 and all the volunteer DJ's average about 75 or 80 and bring their own music from home. If I'm ever super rich, I will make sure 5-0 Plus lives forever. ANYWAY, I flip over to 5-0 hoping for a little Andrews Sisters or a Sousa march or something but instead I get the Beach Boys. Just like Tom Hanks, I can't think of the Beach Boys without thinking of my dad and that almost made me cry but it was Sloop John B and the rhyme scheme of "fits" and "grits" luckily put a stop to those tears. But then it ended and the slammed with Dolly Parton (I told you it's a fantastic station)! Luckily I was already pulling into the driveway or the Tennessee reminder who have sent me over the edge. Now I'm afraid of what the actual song will be that makes me boo-hoo. It's not going to be pretty.

What should be making me cry is the fact that the midwives group isn't calling me back. I've left them two messages on their booking line. I have this nagging feeling that I'll be giving birth on my balcony with those damn parrots squawking at me and Marcel cracking a lot of whale jokes at my expense.

Anyhoo, I'm 8 weeks along now and our little Buster Bluth is about the size of a raspberry and is kicking around its arms & legs with its little creepy webbed fingers and toes. I still feel like it's a bit of a non-exciting time because I'm not buying anything for it until I can start calling it a he or she and we make it past that 3-month hurdle safely. Until then, you can expect many more whiny blogs about what I can and cannot eat. The popcorn is going okay at the moment so we'll add that to the Yay for Me column and if any of you want to test customs by Fedexing me a Mexican pizza (minus the beef) from Taco Bell, I'll love you forever.