27 December 2009

welcome to the pity party

I am exhausted. Yeah, I know all parents are exhausted so I'm not looking for sympathy. Just venting a bit. Ben woke us up about 5 or 6 times last night with his crying. He doesn't actually wake up, just starts wailing in his sleep. I don't know what it's from - he got a new tooth on Christmas so it could be that but he's also got a bad case of diaper rash so maybe it's that or it could be his tummy issues (had a lot of gas and very wet poops the past couple of days)(which has probably caused the diaper rash). I'm at a loss. He settles immediately when I put a boob in his mouth but I still have to wake up and move around so I'm just wasted this morning. I'm blogging at 6.50am so you can tell I've given up on trying to sleep!

And I know it can't be good to just give him the boob all bloody night. Now that he has teeth, I've heard that milk left standing in his mouth can actually rot those little teeth! So the one freaking thing that helps him is actually hurting him in the long run, of course. Nothing can be easy.

He still won't eat. I'm going to try giving him very small chunks of steamed veggies to see if he'll feed himself finger foods. Apparently some babies won't accept anything that they don't feed themselves. That sounds like my stubborn son, doesn't it?

I think I need a break today. I love that boy more than life itself and love spending time with him but I'm about to scream. I can't look at this messy apartment for another day but there's no time to clean it with his micro naps - it seems I always have to choose between bathing or cleaning the kitchen, washing my hair or shaving my legs, eating something or putting away laundry. It just doesn't really end, does it? And I know you're telling me to eat & bathe and do things for myself but then I end up living in squalor and I can't handle it. Right now I have greasy hair and am surrounded by piles of crap that just needs to be put back where it belongs, the kitchen has a rack of clean dishes but twice as many dirty ones waiting to be done and  I have a few loads of laundry that are begging to be put away but there's just no room for them in our tiny closet and I don't have time to reorganize that, though I have plenty of things I need to get rid of seeing as I can't fit my fat ass in my clothes anymore. Sorry, I'm obviously on a 'woe is me' tirade but I'm really, really run ragged and I may as well complain.

No comments:

Post a Comment