Dirty Dancing at 32 weeks

There is something quite serious taking up all the room in my brain today. Why are they going to remake Dirty Dancing? There is no reason to do this - that movie is perfect in every way. They can't improve on it & it will cause a whole generation of grumpy gals like myself to sound even older & sourer than we are by forcing us to give our personal presentations of why the original was so dang special all the bloody time to anyone who will listen. We all have these spiels & if this new piece of crap movie is as bad as I imagine it will be - & I'm imagining terrible things like Channing Tatum & whatever hoochie is currently showing her nether regions & hair extensions at the time - it will slander the Swayze name & I will not stand for it. I will make jolly old London look like a peaceful place to be - rioting & screaming through the streets while taking breaks to dance with watermelons in my arms.

And you KNOW they will slut this movie up. Yes, of course there was sex & sexy themes in the first one but it was awkward & glorious & authentic - whereas I imagine lots of dry humping in the new version & choreographed routines where there should be done.

All that aside, if they put Zac Efron in the lead role I will at least give this movie a chance. But they better let me choose who plays Frances "Baby" because I will not stand for them screwing this up. In fact they should just let me do it myself because I can pull off awkward, gawky, love-struck, terrible dancer like no one's business. They may have to hire a body double for the good dancing & just paste my smiling face over it but it will be worth it, Hollywood.

In other news, I had my 32-week checkup this morning & all is well. They forgot to put my name in the appointment book so they squeezed me in quickly, which was awesome because it meant I was in & out in 10 minutes. I am all about efficiency at the hospital. Well, unless I stumble into the ER with best looking staff on earth again then they can take their precious time while I gawk. But anyway, Fonzie's right on the mark measurement-wise & has got his head down in position ready to go. It's going to be a long 7 weeks for that poor boy now that he's running out of room so I need to come up with schemes to entertain him. Laser light show on my belly, some new songs or books, bongo drum practice, I don't know.

As I mentioned on facebook this morning, I heard my old favorite song on the radio on the way home from the hospital. Ray Stevens' Mississippi Squirrel Revival. Even the name makes me smile right now but when I landed on it I laughed so hard that I startled poor Ben & probably looked a bit loony to fellow drivers. It was enough to make me vow that today's goal would be to relax & laugh as much as possible. I've been so wound up on all our organizing, cleaning, planning blah blah blah & my hormones have severely cut off all my patience so I haven't been the most fun to be around these days. I am seriously bad company. But today I have The Muppets Take Manhattan in my possession from our DVD rental service so that will be our quiet time activity this afternoon, which has taken over from Ben's nap that no longer exists. It never pans out to be true quiet & still time but it's a bit calmer than the rest of the day so I appreciate it. And any movie that shows Kermit the Frog's legs in action is okay by me.

*sigh* I should take a picture of my super gut today to celebrate reaching the 32 week milestone but I think my mirror is even dirtier today than last time since we got Ben a step stool so he can brush his teeth like a big boy beside us. Let's see if I can find a better way to do this that doesn't involve me having to clean the mirror ... this may take a while so I'll get back with that.

In the meantime, I invite you into the wonderful world of Ray Stevens. I always assume the entire world knows these classics but then realize it may be more of a Tennessee thing. I also realized only a few short years ago that much of my father's comedy repertoire is Ray Stevens quotes & faces.  Put on your least mature listening ears & enjoy ...

Mississippi Squirrel Revival

The Streak