So on my wintery walk back from the shops, stopping every so often to put Ben's bloody socks back on & fight the blanket back over his legs, the Hunter Valley eggs made me start thinking of my favorite places that we've visisted but I couldn't really decide on one ... or five ... the world has some truly special corners. So instead of narrowing down any actual favorites, I'm just thinking where I would go if I could take off right now. I'm not in a busy city mood, which is strange for me, so Vegas, Vienna & New York are out. Hmmmm ... I think New Zealand might fit the bill today. I love that place, which has the most stunning, spectacular, amazing scenery that I've ever seen. Ah well, enough dreaming for one afternoon.
Sleep training is still going & is all over the place, I tell you. The wonderful little Benjamin put himself to sleep last night after about an hour of babbling to himself & some whining but no real crying like I expected. That went so well that I knew the night would be brutal & I was right - he was up every 2 hours bawling his eyes out & all around miserable. I fed him a couple of quick times & put him back down but was even crying softly in his sleep, which was heartbreaking. Around 3am I gave up & took him & myself back to bed with Marcel & he drank for a few minutes then slept peacefully until it was time to get up. While technically it was a failure, there was still progress because he didn't drink the whole time we were back in bed like he normally would.
Today was just weird. He was starting to get sleepy so I took him the chair to rock & drink a bit - he fell asleep, which is fine with me. I know it's slower going but I am selfish & want to enjoy rocking him to sleep for naps if I have to give the nights up for now. Anyway, I put him down after he was asleep & of course he woke right up so I left him to sort himself out. It did not work, much crying, whining, then maniacal laughter & playing around then back through the cycle. Eventually I just left & took a shower, etc. & put some toys in his crib. I could hear him still going through it all & then long breaks of silence so I think he may have gotten some quick sleeps in or at least some rest. He didn't go down for a second nap like he has been doing recently but whatever. Our walk probably messed that up.
I think I can hear him whacking our bedroom blinds around so I need to go put on my scolding Mama face & set that boy straight. Then I need to clean. Ugh, why doesn't anything stay clean & orderly??? I even went out & got Subway for lunch because I couldn't bear the thought of making food & adding more mess to the kitchen. I seriously clean that kitchen up every day but it never ever lasts more than a few minutes because there's always one more meal that needs to be made now that Ben is eating. And not having carpeted floors, every crumb he drops shows up ever so nicely. It's good in a way because we have to keep our floors cleaner than our old apartment carpets would have been. Oh my goodness, I am so sorry I'm rambling. I'm a little tired & honestly trying to avoid the cleanathon I need to start.
Now Ben is watching Playschool, which has a dog on it today. He's really getting into animals now, which I looooved because Marcel & I are both big animal people. He throws his animal books & stuffed animals at us all the time to make us make the noises. He's even started hissing now like a snake. He hasn't put it together when I say "What does a snake say?" but if I hiss first, he smiles & hisses right back. So freaking cute. He has also started patting his mouth while saying "Hawawawa" like the old stereotypical American Indian war whooping, which is probably so offensive. No idea where he go this talent except that he started it the day after we watched the Seinfeld episode where Jerry buys Elaine the cigar store Indian - hilarious episode but is my son actually honestly imitating Kramer now? Is this what I have ahead of me? We're in trouble.
Ah well, I'm really going now but not before I share with you my boy admiring the dog.
Oh little man, little man, you make me a happy lady.