major goal

I have one goal for the next week and a half. To be a better mother? Pssshaw. A more patient wife? Hahaha! Eat well, meditate, exercise, relax? Gag me with a spoon. All I want out of life is to keep my legs elevated so my little pig trotters stay as unpuffy as possible. I would like to send a big shout-out to the Australian spring season for suddenly bringing the sun & heat, which is making my one goal a little tricky. Now, I will refer back to my last pregnancy & remind everyone of the great cankles that took over my life during the hot days of work & the painful commute every day for a couple of months, so this little spell of puffiness is no big deal. Yet it drives me insane - I'd like to wear my wedding ring again (wait, did I mention my hands are puffy too?). Anyhoo, a girl needs a goal & that's mine - elevated legs. And just to keep flashing back, I have to say that the best part of having my water breaking all over my damn self for two full days before the hospital would let me stick around was that all my puffiness disappeared into the towels I was forced to sit on. Good times, good times.

Oh, I should have a quick frank little chat with you. Aside from the occasional random Ode to Jesse Jackson kinda day, this truly is a parenting blog. Not a "How to" or "Look how crafty/clever/awesome I am" parenting blog but a "What the hell is going on?" or "ARRRRGGGHHHH!!" or sometimes just a boring "We're still here" kind of a parenting blog. If you've gotten bored or annoyed by the last whiny weeks I will warn you that I don't see it getting any better anytime soon. I suspect having a newborn around will inspire some oooh'ing, awww'ing & talking about itsy bitsy adorable baby parts but also lots of whining about not sleeping, washing onesies & everyone's favorite subject, the various colors of baby poop. You will not hurt my feelings if you stop reading until the children are about 15 & I will laugh hysterically & sincerely about any comments that tell me to shut my trap. I never ever want to come across pretentious in my blogging so please send me a virtual face slap (they hurt less than real ones) if I ever start sounding smug or superior. I'm pretty sure it's impossible to sound smug or superior when you have absolutely no idea what you're doing as a parent.

We got Fonzie's baby corner set up in our room & it's looking pretty good. I'll try to post some pictures for you guys tomorrow if I manage to take a picture that doesn't look like the type that people take of Sasquatch. Can I admit something? The ugly little bumblebee bassinet has grown on me & I'm trying to add another touch or two of bees to the corner to help it seem like it's an intentional theme. There are also a lot of elephants for some odd reason - not sure how they've snuck in but they're there. Bees & elephants are natural BFF's I suppose (???) so we'll just go with it.

And I think we've almost settled on a name. There has been much bitching, lots of raised voices & plenty of "THAT'S NOT A REASON TO VETO A NAME!" All of this was from me, mind you. Marcel is obnoxiously level-headed in arguments & tends to dismiss me when I get worked up, which just makes me madder. Anyway, we agreed on a name last night & even shook on it so it was officially agreed upon by a gentlemen's agreement. Marcel tried to backtrack a bit today but I think me ripping his head off had to have set him straight. We'll see, we'll see.

Anyway, the Bones season finale is on now (yes, we're behind - whatever) & I have no popcorn & no pie so I'm not a happy camper. Must rectify this major situation. Adios!